


Buried Alive

by Midnight Wolf (Larkawolfgirl)



Category: American McGee's Alice
Genre: Emotional, F/M, Gen, Internal Monologue, One-Sided Relationship, Open to Interpretation, POV First Person, Possible Character Death, Present Tense, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-13
Updated: 2014-08-13
Packaged: 2018-02-13 00:39:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2130531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Larkawolfgirl/pseuds/Midnight%20Wolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"She's lost in the darkness, fading away I'm still around here screaming her name" Song fic. Lost by Within Temptation. </p><p>Alice has outgrown Wonderland, but Cheshire has not outgrown her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Buried Alive

**My hope is on fire, my dreams are for sale**  
**I dance on a wire, I don't want to fail her**  
**I walk against the stream, far from what I believe in**  
**I run towards the end, trying not to give in**

Alice has finally made peace with herself. She is no longer struggling with her family’s death. She can traverse into a new and shining world. A real world, not one of make-believe. She has come of age, no longer a child teetering between fancies. She is ready to move on. I know I should feel happy for her but I am struck with sorrow. I want her to move on, to leave this twisted excuse for a home, yet I do not want her to leave me behind. I want to go on living with her, teasing her with my riddles, feeling her steady hands caress my fur. She approaches the cliff’s edge, and a seam appears along the horizon. Darkness spreads around forming a path. She follows the path out of sight. 

**She's lost in the darkness, fading away**  
**I'm still around here screaming her name**  


“Alice!” I scream to no avail as her form continues further into the darkness.

**She's haunting my dream world, trying to survive**  
**My heart is frozen, I'm losing my mind**

My heart aches with all that it can. I know that I only live within her mind, that it doesn't matter if she leaves me or not. I never truly existed to begin with, so why should it matter if we fade back into nothing? I know all this, and yet I don’t want to leave her. I want to be near her always. To see her grin at me, truly happy, and mad (but in a good way from now on). Somewhere in my mind, I know that the best thing for her is to forget about us. To move on from Wonderland and rejoin the real world, but I can’t let her go. I would think myself mad if I weren’t already. This insane desire to grasp onto her and never let her go.

**Help me, I'm buried alive, buried alive**

Our separation crushes me, my non-existent heart pounding in my chest. My bony body trembling from loss. 

**I'm burning the bridges and there's no return**

I shove forward, knowing that it is impossible to follow her, yet somehow I do. I push forward, and forward still, past the point of sight. I follow blindly with only my heart for guidance. 

**I’m trying to reach her, I feel that she yearns**  
**I walk against the stream, far from what I believe in**  
**I run towards the end, trying not to give in**

Could I really become something real? Something that can live outside of her consciousness? The thought strikes me as I creep ever onward. Or will I simply be lost in this darkness for all of eternity? Fear’s icy grip takes full hold of me. What if instead of being snuffed out for eternity, I am left alone in this wasteland of nothingness? At least if I were to disappear I would have no regrets. Now I would be left a rueful soul, longing forever for what is beyond my claws. 

**She's lost in the darkness, fading away**  
**I'm still around here screaming her name**

Knowing it’s useless but out of options, I yell again. “Alice!” I shriek her name and it bounds around me making me feel hollow. I am so empty without her. She has always been there since my birth. She is both my mother and my Goddess. I would call her mistress if she so allowed. She is my everything. I am nothing without her. Forget Wonderland, she is my world. My very existence. 

**She's haunting my dream world, trying to survive**  
**My heart is frozen, I'm losing my mind**  
**Help me, I'm buried alive, buried alive**

I see her to my right. She smiles with such sincerity, reaching out her hands for me. I bound towards her, but as I reach her body I pass through. The apparition vanishes as quickly as it appeared. Am I madder than usual? Is my longing that great? 

**I tried to revive what's already drowned**  
**They think I'm a fool, can't realize**  
**Hope plays a wicked game with the mind**  
**'Cause I thought that love would bind**  
**I cannot revive what's already drowned **  
**She won't come around** ****

“Alice take me with you!” I scream till my throat is raw and bleeding. I turn around to find nothing but darkness. Am I all that’s left of Wonderland? I feel numb. What will become of me? What will become of Alice? Will she find a new cat to love? Will someone else see her gleaming mad face?

**She's lost in the darkness, fading away**  
**I'm still around here screaming her name**  
**She's haunting my dream world, trying to survive**  
**My heart is frozen, I'm losing my mind**  
**Help me, I'm buried alive, buried alive**

I lay deprived of all strength. I tried my best. It is time to let the darkness swallow me. Do with me what you will. A chill overcomes me and I lose all sense of feeling in my limbs. 

_Look at you now, Cat, all weak and given up all hope. Are you going to meet your new friends like that?_ A voice drifts from the distance, and I know that I am home.


End file.
